Fear Steals So Much!
Was I running away from bulls? No way.
Was I jumping out of an airplane? Hell no.
I simply picked up the phone and called a friend.
"Hi." I said.
"Hi Nico, what's up?"
"I've been thinking a lot, and today I can to a big realization."
"Okay. I'm listening"
"I've been inauthentic with most of my friends. I haven't been able to freely speak in conversations because I've been worried that if I share my real thoughts, people won't like what I have to say. It's been stopping a lot of great conversations, and a lot of great friendships. I wanted to tell you that starting now, I'm done with being inauthentic. I'm now the kind of person who opens up completely with friends and doesn't hide anything when he speaks."
For nearly as long as I can remember, I have been afraid to speak my mind. I've been worried about what others think of me, and this has kept me from saying what I actually think.
I've been closed up like a clam, afraid to be open and share who I truly am.
When I told my friend this, I was calm on the outside but it was so hard to get those words out. They were the most authentic words I had spoken in a very long time.
When I told my friend that I was done being inauthentic his response was very enthusiastic. He was thrilled and let me know it! I was overjoyed that he was glad to hear what I had to say; what I really had to say.
I'm not to writing this post to pat myself on the back. I'm writing it so that there's a record of me admitting how damn inauthentic I can be!
I'm finally not hiding.
I was so afraid of letting a friend know who I really was. I felt the same fear on the phone as I did on the edge of the airplane I jumped out of.
It was so hard for me to be authentic. And the people I have been most inauthentic with are those who I call my closest friends!
Inauthenticity takes so much away from relationships. My inauthenticity was caused by fear.
If you can relate to my story, I would love to hear from you. The best place to do so is in the comments below this post.
Let me know if you feel the same fears I do.